Top Ten Skyrim Dislikes

As I said they would be, here are my top ten dislikes from Skyrim:

10) Graphical glitches in this game are few and far between, but they still happen.  The one that amuses me the most is when you mine.  When you activate a vein of ore, you just kind of slide into position to mine it no matter what's in your way.  I slid through mushrooms and even the floor to mine some iron ore.  Now that's dedication.

9) Dual-wielding is a bit awkward, and I know I mentioned it as something that I love, but there are parts that I don't like.  The power attacks are cumbersome and make you flail all over the place while the normal attacks are slow at first.  Of course you can increase the speed with a perk, but that's a different story altogether.

8) Giants; those fuckers are huge!  I don't mind big enemies, but the giants are just so damn difficult no matter what setting you're on.  The attacks shake your screen and cause confusion as well as a hell of a lot of damage.  Add that in with a herd of mammoths and you are just fucked.

7) The transportation in the game is limited and walking everywhere is just a pain in the ass.  Even when you get the Dark Brotherhood horse or buy your own at a stables, the only thing it's really good for is fighting!  I swear that the horses run out of stamina faster than you and run only slightly faster than you.  So when you're going to a location that you haven't discovered yet, have fun walking your ass there.

6) Food is a huge waste of time.  Sure it makes the game more realistic, and it's kind of fun making grilled salmon, but it's fucking worthless.  It's just dead weight in your pack.  Potions weigh less and pack a greater punch.  Now if food crafting was a skill and the food gave you some properties like potions, then it would be worth it.

5) There are so many Draugr and it gets boring fighting them.  I mean really, I know that they're a big part of Skyrim culture and tradition, but why the hell do I fight forty of them in basically every dungeon?  Give me some more variety.  Also, stop allowing them to Shout weapons out of my hands!  I lost some pretty damn good weapons that way.

4) I find that the weapon skill trees are disappointing.  I know that there's not much you can do with the weapon perks, but both the two-handed and one-handed trees are the same and offer very little in the way of variety.  You can either choose to continue to increase damage or level up your power attacks.  Lame.

3) The shopkeepers have absolutely no money.  It's ridiculous!  I can't unload even one dungeon's worth of items at three different shops that all buy different things!  I can hardly sell the potions that I make while leveling up my alchemy skill that I don't want.  There are perks to increase the money that the shops have, but why can't their funds scale with your level?

2) I was really hoping that now that we're in Skyrim, we'd see more of a variety of armor and weapon types, but I'm disappointed here again. We really only see the same ones that we've seen before with the addition of Ancient Nord, Skyforge Steel, and a few others, but really they're just palette swapped with other types in the game.

1) My number one complaint with this game is the goddamn dragons.  That's right, I really don't like how they are unscripted.  I could be just running along, minding my own business while killing some bandits, and a fucking dragon pops up and makes me sit there shooting at it until it lands and then I have to kill it.  This happens way too frequently to be fun and until you beat the main questline, you don't have a way to get the damn things out of the sky, you just need to wait until they land, if they ever do.  It's too bad that my main problem with the game had to be the major enemies, but what can you do?

All in all, I love Skyrim and even if I get bombarded with dragons every 15 minutes, I'm still going to keep playing.

Skyrim

During my time away from this blog, I've been playing a metric shit ton of Skyrim.  I'd love to do some kind of comprehensive review of the thing, but it's just too huge for me to compile at this point in time.  This is my busy time at work and I tend to have less time/want to write when I get home from the office.  In any case, in lieu of a giant review, I'm going to do a top 10 of things that I love and things that I dislike about Skyrim.

Also, before I get started, if you don't want any spoilers, don't read ahead, just look away.

Things I love about Skyrim

10) Acrobatics is gone.  I hated that garbage skill from the last few games.  It's just a worthless waste of stamina.  Now when you jump, you don't waste any energy whatsoever.  Granted this was a skill that I used to pick just to be able to level up by hopping all about and I have now lost that ability, but I've gained a sense of dignity.  No more hopping for levels for me.

9) Enchanting is much easier; I mean MUCH easier.  Instead of having to clear an Oblivion Gate just to get a damn stone for enchanting, you can just disenchant the garbage equipment that you get and use those same enchantments on your new weapons.  The level of your enchanting skill, the perks you've chosen for that skill tree, and the level of the soul in your soul gem are all factors that determine the power of the enchantment.  So much more user-friendly.

8) The third-person view is much improved.  Okay, this one is pretty minor, but it made this position because it's just that damn important to me to be able to see my character move fluidly when in 3rd person.  I don't want to see Gastalf, my dual-spell wizard, running like a damn robot.  I want to see him move like a human being...or Argonian, whatever.

7) Dual-wielding, 'nuf said.  There's a love and dislike factor here for me, which is why it's so low.  The fighting is a little awkward if you use two weapons, but spell and sword is still pretty great.  What I'd like to see are combination attacks with what you have in your two hands further than just having more powerful spells when you do dual-casting.  I want to shoot some fire on my sword, stab a Skeever, and then loot Charred Skeever Hide after it's dead, not just a Skeever Tail and a gold.  (How the hell did it get a gold in the first place?)

6) Bethesda kept the story consistent.  We aren't seeing the same old garbage rehashed though, we're seeing a brand new game with ties to the older games.  Everywhere you see references back to Morrowind and Oblivion.  Each time I see one I have a nostalgic memory of game times gone by.

5) Spell Tomes are much easier to use than the clunky magic system from Oblivion.  Gone are the days where you have to find someone to train with to get spells.  Now you just find Spell Tomes, or buy them, everywhere.  There are a limited number of spells, but with access to all of them via these Tomes, the spell system is much better overall.

4) Blacksmithing is a great way to get new weapons for cheap and level up.  I love being able to go mining in a creature-infested mine to get ore of all types to make my own shit.  Armor, Jewelry, and Weapons are all craftable and improvable in Skyrim and combining the Blacksmithing skill with Enchanting is just one of the ways that your character is able to command their entire environment.

3) Followers are so much better than in Oblivion.  They react to what weapon you have and what weapon the enemy has as well as what distance you are at.  For instance, Aela the Huntress will shoot her bow until the close range game starts and then whip out a shield and sword.  What's most impressive is that I can command her to move to a different location or activate a lever while I fight or activate some other part of a dungeon by a simple command.  I just remember that my old followers in Oblivion would get demolished instantly, while here in Skyrim, they seem to be able to think and strategize.

2) The leveling system has been much improved upon since Oblivion.  Rather than choosing your major and minor skills and leveling up by increasing the former, you now level everything equally.  Sure you start with some skills that are higher than others based upon your race, but that's alright because each skill increase brings you closer to that level 50.  Each increase isn't equal though, as those skills that are lower and higher go up with varying speeds and add to the overall level differently, so to get to level 50 you need to grind hard and vary your skill base.

1) My number one love with Skyrim has to be the environment.  Everything just fits.  The trees you see, the plants, the mountains, the creatures, everything just feels like it belongs in Skyrim.  When I see an elk run by me in the game it feels like I just saw one while on some hike in the Rockies.  Not that I know if there are elk in the Rockies, but that it feels like you are in Skyrim.  It feels like you are the character you created and are going on an adventure to save the land from the dragons.  That's what I'm looking for in an RPG, I want to feel like I am the character, that I'm invested in Skyrim's people and care about saving them.  This is why Skyrim is fantastic.

Tune in tomorrow when I go through my top ten dislikes.  Yeah, not hates, there's nothing I hate about the game yet.  Also, these two posts are kind of a diversion while I finish up my first TV series review.  I'll give you a hint on what show it's on:  Adult Swim presents a solar-powered superhero turned lawyer.  That may have been too much of a hint...

Card Game Review: Scrabble Slam

I fucking love Scrabble.  It's a game that I do well at AND enjoy.  It's like my Holy Grail of competitive, intelligent board games.  So when I found out that there was a Scrabble card game, for on the go and quick Scrabble action, I just about shit my pants.  I was so very excited to get it and play that I bought it based solely on the fact that it says Scrabble on the front without investigating it much further.  Unfortunately my excitement turned to bitter resentment that has kept Scrabble Slam to one lifetime game.  This is literally the second time that I've opened this box to the hellish mockery lurking underneath.

The box itself is pretty cool: red an black with some nice gradient effects that catch your eye.

Looks enticing, right?

The cards are also decent, but the visual stuff isn't what breaks the game, it's the actual gameplay.  One player comes up with a four letter word that becomes the base word.  The rest of the deck is then handed out to the rest of the players.  The guide then says to say, "Ready, Set, Slam!" to begin play, but I find that you can play even without saying that.  Lying bastards!  Play proceeds in that each player can just yell out the word that they are changing the base word to and play one side of one of their cards down on the base word.  The winner is that player that finishes up their hand of cards first.  There are no rules besides acceptable, disputed, and repeated words...What the hell kind of game is that?!  You just yell out a four letter word, there are plenty that I can come up with I assure you, and play one card on top of the other?  There aren't turns or rounds or anything resembling an actual game, it's just chaos.  Chaos dotted by immaturity.  Whether we like it or not, everyone is thinking the same thing when playing this game, "I can spell damn and shit, but are those 'accepted' words?"  Let me tell you, if you're talking about how damn shitty I think this game is, then yes, they're highly acceptable.

All in all, I guess this isn't a terrible game to being with, but when they slammed the name Scrabble on it, Parker Brothers and Hasbro gave it expectations that it couldn't live up to.  Why name a game after another game that it has nothing to do with?  That's just poor marketing.  If you're wanting to play some quick Scrabble action either on the go or at home, my advice is to get it for your phone or iDevice.  Avoid this thing like the plague that it is.

Lazy Post

I'm tired today and don't have the brain energy left to bother with some type of review or rant or anything.  Instead just take a look at the funny links.  Funny if you're a gamer, that is:

http://www.somethingawful.com/d/photoshop-phriday/wrong-end-bosses.php

http://www.somethingawful.com/d/photoshop-phriday/wrong-end-bosses2.php

Here's one for Star Wars fans and fans of classic art:

http://www.somethingawful.com/d/photoshop-phriday/star-wars-art.php

Tomorrow or Thursday we should see another "normal" post.

Card Game Review 1: Skip-Bo

When I was a kid, my family used to play board games a lot.  I mean a lot.  Rather than having family meetings or talking with each other a lot, we would play board games and things would just naturally progress from there into stories of our days and all that jazz.  In my opinion it's the best way to get a kid talking and learning and I'd happily use this the same tactics on my own children.

In any case, I want to review a card game from my childhood called Skip-Bo.

In all it's glory.

Fist off, I want to address the name.  What the hell does Skip-Bo mean?  I did a bit of research and found out that the game is sort of a commercial grade Spite and Malice card game.  Well, that's disappointing.  I was really hoping that it had something to do with some kind of ancient sect of Bo fighters.  What a ripoff.

The idea is that you're playing competitive Solitaire, you build up the center piles while reducing your stockpiles.  The first one to get their stock to zero is the winner.  At least that's how we play it.  According to the rules there's some sort of scoring bullshit.  I guess that the winner of each game get five points for each card remaining in the opponent's stock and 25 points for winning the game.  Why the hell would you do that?  Just play each game seperately and don't keep track of score, it makes things a lot easier on everyone involved.

It's a pretty simple game, but it's highly addictive.  The center piles are empty at the start of the game, and play goes until someone has a one or Skip-Bo to lay down as a foundation. From there, you and your opponent(s), the game is for 2-6 players, alternate turns building each pile up to the 12 card.  Once a center pile is at that point, a new one is started until all of the stockpiles are gone.  As a twist to the original Solitaire, the creators introduced a card that allows you to skip a number; that's the Skip-Bo.  The game's directions indicate to you that it's "wild".  Well, it was wild when I thought it meant an ancient fighting style that use a Bo Staff like Donatello!  Now it's just some kind of skipping crap.  Now there's an image, skipping crap over Lake Superior.  Enjoy that for just a moment.

I'd love to know why Donatello looks like somebody just skipped crap in front of him.

So there's not much left to say about this, but I do find a few things just a little odd.  Why do the Skip-Bo cards have to have the copyright symbol twice?  Did Mattel think that we were going to forget that they copyrighted the phrase and the game?  Why can't they just have it on the damn box and call it good?  The last irk that this game has for me is that in the directions, every reference to something in the game is in capital letters like we wouldn't know that it's referring to what we just read.  Here's a great example:

4. Discard Pile: During play, each player may build up to four DISCARD piles to the left of his STOCK pile.  They can build up any number of cards in any order in the DISCARD pile, but may only play the top card.

Whatever, it's just a game.  My final and favorite thing about this has to be this phrase: "Also SKIP-BO cards are wild.  This is important."  Yeah, it's important alright, but can't we make that determination on our own?

Anyway, besides a few nitpicky things that I found while rifiling through the game, Skip-Bo is a great game, and I'd reccommend it to anyone.  It's fun to play with two players, and even more fun to play with six.  Either way you play it, I guarantee you'll have fun; and always remember...This is important.